


Starlight

by LugianBeforeSwine



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AU where Hajime lives on a farm, Growing Up Together, M/M, it starts when they're 9 and continues through their high school graduation, many many farm animals, mostly fluff with a tiny pinch of angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-11 23:39:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7912006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LugianBeforeSwine/pseuds/LugianBeforeSwine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Hajime is 9 years old, a new student arrives halfway through the school year. Oikawa Tooru and his family have just moved to the area, and right from the beginning, Tooru is determined to befriend Hajime, even though the two have very little in common. The Iwaizumi family lives on a farm, full of cows and horses and sheep. Tooru has always lived in an apartment, and has never even owned a goldfish. Despite Hajime’s frequent protests, Tooru somehow becomes a fixture in his life—and his first real friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Starlight

**Author's Note:**

> Hoooooooo boy. This took me so long and it's not even done yet. But I completed my first Big Bang and I'm so happy! My endless gratitude to the excellent artist who chose my humble outline, [dandelionmeadow](http://www.dandelionmeadow.tumblr.com), for not only the [beautiful art](http://dandelionmeadow.tumblr.com/post/149930567725/youre-not-gonna-fall-hajime-scoffs-i-just), but also for the constant encouragement to keep writing! I appreciate you so much. To anyone reading, I hope you enjoy this fic!

The new kid shows up halfway through the school year. The teacher makes him stand at the front of the classroom and introduce himself, which he seems all too excited to do.

“Hi! I’m Oikawa Tooru. We just moved here a week ago because of my dad’s work. My favorite color is blue and I wanna be an astronaut when I grow up.”

The kid’s grin is blindingly bright, and it only gets worse when he sits at the empty desk next to Hajime, who is studiously avoiding eye contact with him. As soon as their teacher goes back to writing a multiplication problem on the board, the new kid—Tooru—nudges Hajime with his elbow.

“Hey,” he whispers a little too loudly, “I forgot a pencil. Can I borrow one of yours?”

Tooru is still grinning. Hajime doesn’t know why exactly he’s so put off by it. He slides a spare pencil across his desk to Tooru, who thanks him and then asks for his name.

“We’re in the middle of class,” Hajime hisses.

“So?” Tooru says.

“So you’re not supposed to talk during class!” Hajime says, louder than he had intended.

“Hajime,” their teacher says, turning to face her students, “I’m glad you seem to be getting along with Tooru already, but perhaps you could have this conversation after class is over?”

“Yes, miss,” Hajime says, bowing his head. He shoots a sideways glare at Tooru, who sticks his tongue out at him in return.

Hajime already can’t wait for this school day to be over.

-

The bus drops him off half a mile away from his house, but an entrance to the Iwaizumi family farm’s cow pasture is just around the corner from the bus stop. Hajime opens the creaky old gate and latches it securely behind himself. He takes off at a run, heading towards an enormous tree stump where he knows Rosie will be waiting for him.

Rosie isn’t just his favorite cow, she’s _his_ cow. Rosie was born on the same day that he was, and the two of them had been together ever since.

Sure enough, Rosie is standing next to the stump, watching him run at her. Most of the animals get skittish around quick-moving humans, but Rosie knows him and trusts him, so she holds her ground. When he reaches her, he jumps to hug her around her neck and then settles himself down on the stump to start his homework. Pretty soon, his father will appear along the fence line that separates the horses and cows, and he’ll call them in for dinner—Hajime and all the animals.

For now, though, he really needs to get a handle on this multiplication stuff. He’s a good student, but the only kind of math he likes is farm-related. As he works his way through a particularly tough problem, his thoughts travel back to the new kid in his class. He wonders if Tooru is good at math. He seems like the sort of person who’s good at everything, if the number of times he raised his hand in class today is any indication. The most infuriating part, Hajime thinks, is that his answers weren’t always right, but he _didn’t even care_. Hajime has always been easily embarrassed, but Tooru appeared unflappable.

Hajime tries to shove those thoughts aside and gazes at Rosie instead. One of the other cows, Bonnie, has wandered up next to her and the two of them are eating grass side-by-side.

Hajime has never had a real, proper friend, which he thinks is okay because he’s only nine, still very young. And he’s never minded not having close friends, because he gets along pretty well with everyone in school, and he has his animals. He’ll always have his animals. This farm is where he was born, and the residents of its pastures and barns and coops have been the best of friends to him.

But maybe, he thinks, it might be nice to have a human friend.

Too bad Tooru is so annoying. He got Hajime in trouble on his very first day in class—someone like that probably wouldn’t be a great friend.

-

The bus arrives at school ten minutes before class starts, so Hajime takes a seat in the cafeteria with the rest of the students who are there early. He’s exhausted from staying up late to complete his homework, so he plops his backpack onto the table in front of him and uses it as a pillow. There’s no way he could actually fall asleep here—his classmates are far too loud—but it’s still irritating when he’s forced to open his eyes after he hears someone call his name.

He picks his head up and finds himself face-to-face with Oikawa Tooru, who is sitting across the table from him and flashing him a winning smile.

Tooru says “Good morning, sunshine,” and Hajime quickly squashes the urge to punch him. Instead, he asks in a low growl,

“How did you find out my name?”

Tooru points to a tag on Hajime’s backpack which reads _Property of Iwaizumi Hajime_. “Oh,” Hajime says, slightly embarrassed despite his best effort to play it cool. “Right.”

“So?” Tooru asks.

Hajime shoots him a blank stare. “What?”

“Aren’t you going to ask my name?”

“I know your name, butthead. You introduced yourself to the whole class.”

Tooru laughs as though this whole conversation has been a hilarious joke. “Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Oh!” he says suddenly, reaching into his backpack. “Here’s your pencil!”

Hajime eyes it warily. “Just keep it. It’s got your germs all over it now, anyway.”

“Hey!” Tooru’s face transforms into a pout just as the bell rings to signify that class will begin in two minutes. The students make a mass exodus out of the cafeteria, and Hajime tries to lose Tooru in the crowd. Except as he’s walking out into the hallway, he feels someone tug on his backpack and turns around against his better judgement.

“Wait!” Tooru says as soon as he gets Hajime’s attention. “I don’t remember where our classroom is!”

Hajime heaves a dramatic sigh and pries Tooru’s hand off his backpack. Why had this kid chosen to latch onto him—literally—instead of one of the thirty-some other students in their class? But Hajime says “Follow me,” and Tooru does.

-

It’s raining, and the cows are lying down in their run-in sheds, napping through the downpour. Hajime has always loved being outside when it’s raining—something about the smell of rain calms him down and helps him think. He’s leaning against Rosie, his back on her side, and the steady in-out motion of her chest as she breathes lulls him into sleep.

When Hajime’s father finds him there two hours later, he smiles as he gently places a hand on his son’s shoulder to wake him up. The rain has stopped, and it’s time for dinner.

-

The Oikawa family’s new apartment is twice as big as their last one, and Tooru doesn’t know what to do with all the extra space. The thing that confounds him the most is having his own room—it feels so empty without his sister there, too. Of course, her room is just across the hall from his, but it’s something he’s not yet used to.

It’s a strange feeling to miss someone despite them being right across the hall.

His sister’s bedroom door is closed. He knocks on it and calls out “Masako?”

“Come in!” she calls back.

Tooru opens the door. His sister is hanging a painting on her wall, one that used to hang in their shared bedroom. She straightens it out and then turns to look at her younger brother. “What’s up, shrimp?” She’s smiling, and it makes Tooru smile.

“Wanna build a blanket fort in the living room?” Tooru asks.

“Hell yeah!” Masako exclaims, and Tooru immediately claps a hand over his own mouth.

“I’m telling Mom that you swore!” he says through his fingers.

“You wouldn’t dare,” Masako says, eyes glinting.

“I would too! Just because you’re fourteen now—” Masako runs at him and Tooru yelps, dashing out of the bedroom.

There’s not a lot of room to run in the apartment, and Masako quickly catches Tooru around the torso, knocking them both to the ground. They’re laughing breathlessly, and it takes a few moments before Tooru can squeak out “Blanket fort?”

“Blanket fort,” Masako agrees.

-

Tooru starts walking to the classroom with Hajime every morning, despite the fact that since he’s been attending this school for three weeks, he surely knows where it is by now. He seems to be on good terms with most of the other students in their class, but for whatever reason, he chooses to spend the vast majority of every school day pestering Hajime.

In spite of his best effort to the contrary, Hajime gets used to Tooru’s presence at school. He catches himself waiting for Tooru to arrive in the cafeteria before class starts, and he willingly hangs out with him at recess. Tooru still talks too much and is way too enthusiastic about everything for Hajime’s liking, but at some point Tooru’s rambling stops being annoying and starts to be almost comforting. There’s something very pleasant in the routine of it all—of having someone his own age be a constant in Hajime’s life.

One day, about two months after Tooru transferred to Hajime’s school, Tooru fails to show up in the cafeteria before class starts. Hajime thinks that maybe he missed the bus and is on his way to school on foot, and sure enough, Tooru arrives to class 15 minutes late, sweaty and winded. As he takes his seat and Hajime gets a closer look at him, though, he notices that there’s something else off about Tooru: the skin around his eyes appears red and puffy, as though he’s been crying.

As their teacher continues talking about the writing project they’ve been working on this week, Hajime catches Tooru’s eyes and tilts his head in confusion, asking him a silent question. Tooru shakes his head quickly and plasters a weak smile on his face, then goes back to facing the front of the classroom, sniffling quietly once.

When it’s time to go to lunch, Hajime grabs Tooru’s sleeve as he stands up from his desk, so that there’s no opportunity for the other boy to avoid him. “What happened?” he hisses as they exit the classroom.

Tooru forces that same weak, obviously fake smile onto his face. Hajime hates it. “Nothing, I just missed the bus and I had to run here.”

Hajime knows he’s lying, but he doesn’t want to press the issue. That is, until they sit down in the cafeteria and Hajime notices that Tooru hasn’t brought a lunch. “Where’s your lunch?” he asks.

“Oh!” Tooru says, laughing a little. “I forgot it at home.”

“Then aren’t you going to buy a lunch?”

An unreadable expression flits across Tooru’s face. He says, “I don’t have any money.”

Hajime stares at him. Tooru looks away, embarrassed. When he looks up again, half of Hajime’s sandwich is sitting on the table in front of him.

Tooru starts. “You don’t—”

“Shut up and eat,” Hajime growls, digging into his half of the sandwich. He misses the small smile that appears on Tooru’s face, and the way he wipes his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt.

-

Hajime’s bus is late picking him up the next day, and as a result, he arrives at school just as the two-minute-warning bell is ringing. He’s about to race inside when he hears something amidst the conversations of the students hurrying past him. He strains his ears in the direction of the school garden, which is across from the bus drop-off area. It sounds like someone is crying. Hajime thinks back to yesterday, about Tooru’s red and swollen eyes, and then he doesn’t think anything at all.

He hurtles past a teacher who is trying to corral him into the building, sprints across the blacktop of the parking lot, and skids to a halt behind a giant oak tree that stands in the center of the garden. Tooru is on the ground, trying to stifle his sobs as an older boy sneers down at him, holding Tooru’s lunch in his hand.

Hajime’s fist connects with the older kid’s face before he’s even fully realized that he’s going to punch someone. His nine-year-old fist is not very powerful, but the other student is caught completely off-guard by the blow, and it sends him staggering backwards, falling on his butt.

Hajime drops to his knees by Tooru, who immediately sits up and clutches at Hajime’s arms tightly, his body shaking with relentless sobs. Two teachers round the corner then and quickly assess the situation. The older boy has a hand over his nose, and blood is dripping from between his fingers. Coherent thought rushes back into Hajime’s head, and he moves in order to position himself between Tooru and the other student, then stares up helplessly at the gathered teachers.

-

Hajime is suspended from school for three days, as is the other student who had knocked Tooru down and taken his lunch. Although Hajime is ashamed for being punished, he knows he would do it again if he had to. He thinks about Tooru lying on the ground, defenseless and crying. Hajime was going to make sure that would never happen again, even if he had to endure another suspension.

It was becoming easier and easier to let Tooru into his life.

-

On the third and final day of his suspension, Hajime is sweeping out the aisle of the horse barn when his mother appears at the barn’s entrance, holding a cordless phone. “Your friend is on the line,” she says, smiling at her son. She and Hajime’s dad had not been at all angry with him when they had heard the reason behind his being suspended. “The one you heroically rescued.” She says this only to see her son blush, and it works.

He snatches the phone from her and she takes the broom from him, whistling as she walks off to finish his sweeping. Hajime strides out of the barn and perches himself on a fence beam before answering the phone. “Hello?”

“Hajime!” says a voice that he would recognize anywhere. Hajime smiles without really realizing it. “Are you okay?”

“Of course I’m okay,” Hajime replies gruffly. “I should be asking you that.”

“I’m fine!” Tooru says quickly. “I just miss you at school.”

“Has anyone else been bothering you?”

“No one!” Tooru answers.

“Good,” Hajime says. There’s a pause wherein he realizes that this is the first time they’ve talked on the phone. He can hear Tooru breathing softly on the other end of the line. He looks out over the pastures and barns, then picks at a loose thread on his jeans.

“Hey,” he says before he can change his mind.

“Hmm?” Tooru says.

“Do you…” Hajime falters. He tries again. “Do you wanna come over tomorrow?”

It takes Tooru a few seconds to reply, which for some reason feels like torture to Hajime. Finally, Tooru breathes out a laugh and says, “Of course I do!”

Hajime smiles. “Okay,” he says. “Write down this address.”

-

Hajime is waiting for Tooru at the far end of the cow pasture, where the school bus picks him up and drops him off. Tooru had assured him that he had memorized the directions to Hajime’s house, but still, Hajime can’t help but be a little worried. He’s not sure exactly where Tooru lives, but there are no apartment complexes that are particularly close to his house.

A few minutes after Hajime starts pacing the fence line, he hears the sound of dirt and gravel crunching down the road, and Tooru appears in his line of sight a few seconds later, furiously pedaling his bike and grinning like a maniac. Hajime breathes out a small sigh of relief as Tooru gracefully hops off the side of his bike and walks it up to the pasture gate.

“Hey,” Hajime calls, smiling back.

Tooru is a little winded, but he still manages an enthusiastic wave. “Hey! Is this where I come in?” he says, pointing to the gate. Hajime finally reaches the gate and unlatches it for him.

“Yup. Umm,” he pauses for a second, tilting his head in consideration. “Welcome to the farm. I guess.”

Tooru’s smile is so bright it could power the whole farm. “Thanks, Hajime! I’m so excited! I’m so glad you invited me over! I’ve never—” he abruptly cuts himself off, his bike falling to the ground at his side, wide eyes locked onto something behind Hajime’s right shoulder.

Hajime turns and smiles when he sees what caught Tooru’s attention. “This is Rosie,” he says, turning back to Tooru. “She’s my favorite cow.” At the sound of her name, Rosie takes a few more steps towards them. When Tooru just continues staring at her in awe, Hajime laughs a little and says, “You can pet her if you want. She’s really friendly.”

“Oh, wow,” Tooru says finally, moving a little closer. He lets out a short, stunned laugh as Rosie comes to stand right in front of him. He looks to Hajime. “What should I do? Where should I pet her?”

“She likes to have her shoulders scratched,” Hajime says, coming to stand next to Tooru. “But first, put your hand out for her to smell.”

Tooru extends one hand cautiously towards Rosie’s face, and she makes a snuffling noise as she inspects his hand for treats. Tooru laughs, so bright and pleased that it makes Hajime laugh, too. “She wants to see if you have food,” he says to Tooru, and then says to Rosie, “Sorry, girl, you’ll have to wait til dinner.” She turns her head in Hajime’s direction, and he reaches out a hand to give her a quick scratch on the neck.

“Are there more?” Tooru asks, looking around eagerly.

“Yeah,” Hajime says, pointing to one of the run-in sheds, “they’re probably hanging out in there. Or around that clump of trees.” He points to the opposite end of the pasture and Rosie gently nudges his extended arm. “Cut it out, girl,” he says, laughing. “You’ll get fed soon enough.”

No matter where Tooru looks, his eyes remain wide with wonder, even when they settle on Hajime. It makes Hajime feel both uncomfortable and pleased to be on the receiving end of that gaze, which seems like an impossible mixture of emotions.

Hajime takes Tooru on a thorough tour of the Iwaizumi farm. They stop to visit with the other cows, then the horses, the sheep, and the chickens. Every so often, a cat or dog will cross their path, and Hajime reaches out to them and calls every animal by name.

“How do they know not to run away?” Tooru asks, reaching down to pet a sleek black cat.

“They know that we’re the ones who feed them. If they ever do leave the farm, they’ll come back at dinner time. And they all have tags,” Hajime adds, gesturing at the faded blue collar around the cat’s neck, “just in case.”

“Wow,” Tooru says for perhaps the fifteenth time that day. “Animals are really smart.”

Hajime nods his head in agreement. “The horses and cows all know which stall belongs to them. They just enter the barn in a line and go in the right stalls.”

“That’s awesome!” Tooru says. “I wish I had a pet. But the apartment we live in won’t allow animals.”

Hajime takes a minute to think this over. It seems terribly unfair, that Tooru has never experienced a life with animals. “Well,” Hajime says finally, meeting Tooru’s eyes, “you can always come over here. And then maybe it’ll be like having a pet.”

Tooru just stares at him. Hajime starts a feel a little uncomfortable under the weight of that stare. Then all of a sudden, a tear pools in the corner of one of Tooru’s eyes, and he blinks, sending it running down his cheek.

“Why are you crying?!” Hajime asks immediately, grabbing Tooru by the shoulders. Was that the wrong thing for him to say, telling Tooru that he could keep coming over? Isn’t that what friends do? He was trying to be nice!

Tooru sniffles and then lets out a laugh, wrapping his arms around Hajime’s chest. Hajime goes stock still, but Tooru doesn’t seem to notice. “I’m sorry,” Tooru says, sniffling again. “It’s just—thanks, Hajime.”

Hajime awkwardly pats Tooru’s shoulders, feeling very overwhelmed by the whole situation. “You’re welcome,” he says, still not entirely sure what’s going on. “Are…are you okay?” he adds after a moment.

Tooru pulls away from him. He’s grinning from ear to ear, and it makes a relieved smile break on Hajime’s face. “I’m fine,” Tooru says. His eyes still look a little wet, and he sniffles one more time, but his smile doesn’t fade.

-

Tooru ends up staying for dinner. Hajime’s parents are more than happy to include him—they always make too much food for three people, Hajime’s mom says.

“Did Hajime give you a tour of the farm?” she asks once they’ve all settled in with their food.

“Yeah!” Tooru says excitedly. “It was great! I saw the cows and the horses and the chickens and the—”

“Yeah, he saw everything,” Hajime interrupts, shooting a fake-annoyed look at Tooru from across the table.

Tooru carries on as if nothing has happened. “—and the sheep and the dogs and the cats! Oh! Hajime, what was that cat’s name? The one by the horse barn that let me pet it?”

“That was Mack.”

“Yeah, Mack! He was so sweet! Some of the other cats didn’t want to be petted, but he loved it!”

Hajime’s mom smiles fondly at Tooru as he continues chattering on happily. There’s a part of Hajime that wants to tell Tooru to stop talking and finish his dinner, but a bigger part of him is content to listen, and he lets that part win out.

-

It’s starting to get dark by the time dinner is over, so Hajime’s dad offers to drive Tooru home. Hajime helps Tooru load his bike into the bed of the Iwaizumi’s pickup truck, and then the three of them squish together in the cab.

When they pull up outside the apartment complex where Tooru lives, Hajime follows Tooru out of the car to retrieve his bike. Tooru props it up against his side and turns to face Hajime. “Thank you,” he says. “Your house is so cool. And so are your parents! Tell them thanks for dinner!”

“I’m pretty sure you already told them that about six times,” Hajime says, smiling.

“Well,” Tooru says, “tell them again anyway.”

“Alright, I will.”

“See you on Monday?”

“Yeah. See you then.” Hajime watches Tooru chain his bike to a rack outside one of the apartment building’s doors, then Tooru waves once and disappears inside.

“Your friend seems like a very nice boy,” Hajime’s dad says on the ride home.

“He’s okay,” Hajime says, rolling his eyes, but his dad doesn’t miss the smile on his son’s face.

**[age 12.]**

“You don’t have to just watch, you know,” Hajime says, coming to a stop beside Tooru, who is leaning against the fence. Hajime is riding one of the farm’s horses, a grey mare named Dreamer. “Dream already likes you, and she’s really good for being ridden.”

“I know,” Tooru says, pushing off the fence and reaching out to scratch Dreamer’s neck, “but it’s still a long way down.”

“You’re not gonna fall,” Hajime scoffs. “I just told you, she’s really good.”

“Maybe for you,” Tooru says petulantly. “You actually know what you’re doing.”

“I promise she’s a good teacher,” Hajime says. He jumps down off her back and leads her over to the large boulder that’s used as a makeshift mounting block. “C’mon,” he calls. “I’ll walk right next to you.”

Tooru shoots him a dubious look which Hajime chooses to ignore. Dreamer flicks her ears back towards Tooru, as if asking him where he is. “Fine,” Tooru says, sighing in defeat. “But if I fall, I’m blaming you.”

“You’re not gonna fall,” Hajime repeats, shaking his head and smiling as Tooru steps up onto the rock. “Alright, put your left foot in the stirrup and swing yourself onto her back. I’ll hold the reins for now.”

Tooru does as he’s told. Dreamer stands still, waiting for a signal to move.

“Okay,” Hajime says. “Squeeze your heels against her side to ask her to walk.”

“How do I stop her?” Tooru asks before he does anything.

“I’m holding the reins for now. We’ll worry about that in a minute.”

“We’ll worry about _stopping_ in _a minute_? That seems a little late, don’t you—”

“Tooru,” Hajime growls.

Tooru obediently squeezes his heels. Dreamer begins to walk. After the initial lurch of her first few steps, it’s actually not all that bad. There’s a rhythm to her gait that’s comfortable to follow.

“Well?” Hajime asks, walking backwards so he can assess Tooru’s progress, “what do you think?”

“It’s…not bad,” Tooru says, fingers twisted through Dreamer’s mane.

“That’s what I thought,” Hajime says, smirking slightly. They walk down the dirt trail that runs in front of the horse barn, then circle back to where they began. Hajime stops walking, and Dreamer stops with him, then Hajime flips the reins over Dreamer’s head. “Okay, hold on to the reins like this.” Hajime demonstrates the proper positioning of his hand, then lets go so Tooru can try.

Tooru closes his fists around the reins. “Is this right?” he asks.

Hajime makes a _tch_ sound and pries Tooru’s fingers apart. “No, put your thumb on top, not around it. Like that. And then move your pinkies so they’re underneath the rein. There you go.” When Hajime looks up, Tooru’s face is dusted pink. He only has a second to think about that before Tooru obnoxiously clears his throat.

“Umm, so!” Tooru says loudly. “How do I stop?”

Hajime shakes his head, banishing all non-horse-related thoughts. “Pull back on both reins to stop. Pull the left rein to turn left, and the right rein to turn right. You don’t have to pull very hard, though. Dreamer will know what you want.”

Tooru eyes the top of Dreamer’s head appraisingly, as if searching for the validity of that statement. Dreamer’s ears twitch back and forth between him and Hajime. “Will you still walk next to me?” Tooru asks. “Just in case.”

Hajime smiles up at him. “Yeah,” he says, then adds, “you big baby.”

“Whatever,” Tooru scoffs, but he’s smiling, too.

-

When the school bus stops outside the apartment complex, Hajime follows Tooru down the steps and around the corner of the building. They go through a door, then up a stairway to the second floor, and at the end of the hallway, Tooru tries the knob on the door to his apartment.

“Why does she always lock the door?” he groans, rapping his knuckles against the metal.

“Maybe ‘cause you’re super annoying?” Hajime supplies helpfully.

Tooru sticks his tongue out at his friend, then presses his ear to the door. “She’s playing music. Masako!” he yells, knocking louder. “Let us in!”

There’s a muffled shout from inside, and then the door swings open. “Goodness gracious, twerp,” Tooru’s sister says, reaching out and ruffling his hair. “I was in the bathroom.”

“Gross,” Tooru says, shouldering past her into the living room. Hajime shoots her an apologetic smile, shrugging. The two of them drop their backpacks on the floor. Hajime settles in on the couch, and Tooru reaches over to the radio next to the TV and turns the volume down.

Masako pounces. She snags Tooru by the waist, dragging him towards her, and Tooru uselessly flaps his arms against her hold, making squawking noises of indignation.

“I don’t understand,” Masako says to Hajime from around the frantic squirming of her younger brother, “why you hang out with this kid.”

“Masako!” Tooru screeches.

“I mean,” Masako continues, tightening her hold and deftly avoiding the backwards kick Tooru aims at her legs, “he’s so annoying, right?”

“AGH!” Tooru wails, slapping ineffectively at his sister’s arms.

“And it’s not like he’s all that funny, or smart, or—”

Hajime starts laughing uproariously. Tooru’s face is bright red.

“Why are you so _tall_ —”

“And it just seems like you’re too good for him, you know?” Masako is grinning as she fights to maintain her hold.

“I dunno,” Hajime says, laughing between his words, “I think he’s pretty okay.”

“SEE?” Tooru says immediately, then pauses in his struggle. “Wait, pretty okay?!”

Hajime and Masako both burst out laughing, and Masako finally releases her brother from her grip.

“Geez!” Tooru says, brushing himself off and looking back and forth between the two of them. “You guys are terrible! You two are my favorite people in the world, and yet you treat me like this—”

“Oh, Tooru,” Masako says, and tries to pull him into a hug, which Tooru shies away from, eyes wide. He’s smiling, though, the tiniest hint of an upward curl to his lips.

“I don’t think I can ever trust you again,” he proclaims dramatically.

Masako is beaming despite his words. “I’ll be in my room doing homework,” she says, then adds, “I love you, shrimp.”

Tooru crosses his arms and turns away petulantly, but from his seat on the couch, Hajime can very clearly see his smile.

“C’mon,” Masako says, drawing out the ‘o’ sound.

“I love you too,” Tooru grumbles finally. Masako shoots Hajime a thumbs-up, and he laughs.

“Knock if you need something,” she says, and disappears into her bedroom.

Later, after Tooru’s parents have come home from work and Masako has left for a friend’s house, Tooru and Hajime are sitting side-by-side on Tooru’s bed, backs against the wall with their legs stretched out in front of them.

“You and your sister get along so well,” Hajime says.

“You say that after you saw her torture me?!” Tooru replies, feigning offense.

Hajime rolls his eyes. “Whatever. You know what I mean.” He pauses. “I kind of wish I had an older sibling.”

“No you don’t,” Tooru says. “They’re terrible.”

Hajime raises an eyebrow at him. “Are they really?”

Tooru relents. “No, not really. Masako is the best. But I bet not all siblings are like her.”

“That’s probably true,” Hajime says. They sit in silence for a moment, then Hajime speaks again. “Tooru?”

“Hmm?” Tooru replies.

“I think you’re better than pretty okay.”

Tooru whips his head around to look at him so fast that Hajime is surprised it doesn’t hurt his neck. Tooru’s lips part slightly, but he doesn’t say anything, so Hajime continues.

“You’re my best friend,” he says. He feels like he should continue, like there should be a speech forthcoming, but he finds that there’s really nothing more to say after that. It’s the truth, and that’s it.

Tooru just goes on looking at him. His eyes are wide, and his lips are pressed together, like he’s about to—

“Don’t cry!” Hajime says immediately.

“I’m not gonna cry!” Tooru says. “I…I don’t know what I’m gonna do.” His gaze flits around his room and then lands on Hajime again. “You’re my best friend, too,” he says quietly.

Hajime’s chest feels like it’s filling up with warmth. It’s uncomfortable, and he ruffles Tooru’s hair to distract himself. Tooru leans forward and hides his face against Hajime’s shoulder. Hajime’s hand slips down until it’s resting on Tooru’s back, and they stay like that until there’s a knock on Tooru’s door.

“Hajime, sweetheart?” It’s Tooru’s mother. “Your dad is here to pick you up.”

-

“Dad?” Hajime asks on the way home. “Is it weird to only have one friend?”

“I don’t think it’s weird at all,” Hajime’s dad answers. “Besides, you get along well with your classmates, right?”

“I guess,” Hajime says. “But I wouldn’t consider them to be my friends.”

“Are you happy?”

The question startles Hajime. “Huh?”

“Are you happy?” his dad repeats. “With school. With the farm. In general.”

Hajime stops to think about it. He loves the farm. He loves Rosie, and Dreamer, and all the other animals. He loves his parents, no matter how uncool it might sound. And he’s doing well in school, enjoying his classes for the most part, and both excited and nervous to start middle school next year.

And his best, and only, friend is Oikawa Tooru.

“Yeah,” Hajime says finally. “I’m happy. I’m really happy.”

“Then I think it’s just fine,” his dad says.

-

It’s winter, but the sun is out in full force, and Tooru and Hajime are riding the perimeter of the farm, their winter jackets lying unneeded inside Hajime’s house. Tooru has gotten much more confident on horseback, and though he’s nowhere near Hajime in terms of skill, he figures that’s okay. The whole being-innately-good-with-animals thing is a gift Hajime possesses and Tooru does not. Just being allowed to share moments like this with Hajime is good enough for Tooru.

“Umm,” Tooru starts, leading Dreamer up next to Hajime’s horse, a tall bay gelding named Gatsby, “there’s something I gotta tell you.”

“Huh?” Hajime says, turning to face him. Gatsby’s ears twitch towards Tooru. He has quite the audience. Dreamer also seems to be listening.

“Masako…” Tooru starts, then takes a deep breath and wills himself to finish the sentence. “Well, she’s pregnant.”

Hajime’s hands involuntarily jerk on the reins and Gatsby comes to an abrupt stop. Tooru stops Dreamer next to him. Hajime is staring at Tooru, an unreadable expression on his face. “Wow,” he says finally, his eyes softening. “You’re gonna be an uncle.”

Tooru lets out a little surprised laugh. “Yeah. I guess I am.” Suddenly, that seems like quite a lot of responsibility. Before he can get too worried, though, Hajime interrupts his train of thought.

“When is she due?”

“In September. She found out two weeks ago, but she waited a little bit to tell us. She was scared,” Tooru says, and he almost looks angry for a second, but then the expression vanishes. “I know why she didn’t want to tell us right away. She was ashamed. But she has no reason to be.”

“How did your parents take it?” Hajime asks as they get the horses walking again.

“Mom took it pretty well. Dad, not so much. He wasn’t mad at her, but he seemed just really upset in general. I think he thought her boyfriend was gonna leave her or something.”

“He didn’t leave, did he?”

“No,” Tooru says. “Masako said that he’s terrified, but he promised to stick with her. I guess his parents have been really nice about it, too.”

“Well, that’s good,” Hajime says. They walk in silence for a few minutes, circling around the cow pasture and up towards the chicken coop. Toby, a brown tabby cat, saunters out from behind the coop and stops next to Gatsby, then makes an amazing leap up into Hajime’s lap. Gatsby doesn’t even blink, and neither does Hajime. “Hey, pal,” he says, dropping the reins for a second to scratch Toby behind the ears.

Toby remains perched on the saddle in front of Hajime as they walk back to the horse barn, and Tooru thinks that no matter how many times he visits Hajime’s house, he’ll never get used to things like this. In a way, he envies Hajime’s quiet life here with his animals, especially since Tooru’s own family is in such a state of turbulence right now, but then he looks at the peaceful smile on Hajime’s face as he halts Gatsby next to the barn, and the only things he feels towards his friend are affection and gratitude.

-

“What if I’m not a good uncle?” Tooru whispers to Hajime at lunch the next day. “I mean, I’m a kid—”

“We’ll both be teenagers before the baby is born,” Hajime interrupts.

Tooru takes a moment to consider that. The prospect of being a teenager is both thrilling and terrifying. Still, though… “Yeah, but that won’t make much of a difference.”

“You’ll be fine,” Hajime says, smiling. “You’re gonna be the best uncle in the world.”

When Hajime smiles at him like that, Tooru can believe in anything.

-

The next time Hajime goes to Tooru’s apartment, renovations are in full swing. Tooru’s parents are switching rooms with Masako so that she and the baby can take advantage of the larger space in the master bedroom. This means that the living room is currently full of haphazardly-placed furniture, and Hajime trips twice on his way to Tooru’s bedroom.

Masako is in her old room, emptying out her dresser drawers. The master bedroom has a large closet, so she probably won’t need the dresser anymore. “Hey, you two,” she says when she spots Tooru and Hajime.

Hajime thinks she looks older somehow, more mature. Her figure is the same—no baby bump yet—but something in her face looks different. “Congratulations,” Hajime tells her.

“Oh, thanks,” she says, waving her hand in a dismissive gesture. “It’s not exactly my greatest accomplishment, but—”

“You’re gonna be such a good mom,” Tooru states, as if it’s a fact, tested and true. “And I’m gonna try my best to be a good uncle.”

“I know, Tooru,” she says. Hajime gets the idea that they’ve been over this particular point before. “I already love this baby, and it’s probably only the size of a grape or something.” That gets both Hajime and Tooru to laugh, and Masako smiles. “Well, as you can see, I have a lot of work to do,” she says.

“Yeah, we’ll leave you to it,” Hajime says. Tooru nods and follows Hajime into his own room, shutting the door behind them.

“What was that about?” Hajime asks quietly once the door is fully closed.

“What was what about?”

“You kinda freaked out on her,” Hajime says.

“It’s because—” Tooru starts, and then sighs, sitting on the floor with his back resting against his bed. Hajime joins him. “She’s so hard on herself,” Tooru says finally. “Like she’s still so ashamed, even though me and Mom and Dad are all being really supportive. I just—I want her to know that it’s okay.”

“I think she knows,” Hajime says. He reaches up and squeezes Tooru’s shoulder once, and is immediately confused as to why he suddenly had that impulse.

Tooru smiles a little and scoots closer to Hajime. “I hope so,” he says. “I love her so much, you know?”

Hajime smiles back at him. “Yeah, I know.”

**[age 14.]**

“Remember when you first came here, and you introduced yourself in front of the class?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“I remember you saying you wanted to be an astronaut when you grew up.”

“Well, yeah!” Tooru exclaims. “How cool would that be? Seeing all the stars, and different planets, and maybe even finding some aliens!”

Hajime smirks at him. “I don’t think you’re smart enough to be an astronaut.”

“Thanks, Debbie Downer,” Tooru snaps immediately. “I love the way you just spread confidence and joy wherever you go.”

Hajime just laughs at him. Tooru isn’t actually mad, and they both know it.

“Anyway,” Hajime says, “since the chances of you actually going into space are abysmally low, I found what I believe to be a pretty good alternative.”

“What,” Tooru asks, “an anti-gravity room?”

Hajime shoots him a narrow-eyed look. “No. A telescope.”

“Oh,” Tooru says. He’s pleasantly surprised.

“My dad found it in his shed yesterday, and apparently it still works. And the sky is supposed to be pretty clear tonight, so…”

“Maybe we’ll see some aliens through it!” Tooru says hopefully.

“I highly doubt that.”

Later that night, they set up camp on top of a small hill in the cow pasture. Rosie meanders over to see what they’re doing as Hajime tries to remember his dad’s instructions for operating the telescope. Finally, he gets it set up and takes a look through it. At first, all he can see is a fuzzy blackness. He plays with the focus a little bit, and the static against the black background resolves itself into a cluster of stars.

“Woah,” Hajime says in wonder.

“What do you see?” Tooru asks excitedly.

“Take a look,” Hajime says, stepping aside. Tooru eagerly presses his face up against the eyepiece, and Hajime laughs a little under his breath at how excited his friend is.

“Woah is right!” Tooru reports a few seconds later, twisting the focusing knob. “Hajime, this is so cool!”

Hajime can feel the beginnings of a blush fanning out over his cheekbones, so he shoves Tooru aside and fiddles intently with the telescope. “Let me find something else.”

“Alright, bossypants,” Tooru says amiably.

After about half an hour, their eyes start to hurt from squinting into the lens, and Tooru flops onto his back as Hajime packs the telescope away. Tooru crosses his arms behind his head as Hajime sits down next to him. He points to a faint star in the sky. “Do you think we saw that one through the telescope?” he asks.

“How would I know?” Hajime replies, settling down onto his back. “They all just look like stars.”

Tooru laughs. Hajime doesn’t understand why that particular sentence was so funny. He’s about to ask as much when Tooru suddenly rolls away from him.

Hajime quirks an eyebrow. “Where are you going, exactly?” he asks.

“Ugh,” comes the reply, muffled against the grass where Tooru lies facedown. “Over here. Nowhere. Never mind.”

Hajime is bewildered. “Okay?” he says, and it comes out sounding like a question. He waits a few seconds, then asks, “Do you wanna go back inside?”

Tooru finally turns his head to face him. He looks a little upset. “Nah,” he says. “Let’s stay here for now.”

“You sure?” Hajime pushes. “You look a little…off.”

“I’m just tired,” Tooru replies. “Hidenori had a bad night. Lots of screaming involved. I thought Masako was actually going to tear her hair out. But anyway. I wanna stay here.”

“Okay,” Hajime replies, deciding to let the issue drop. “We can stay.”

Tooru just looks at Hajime for a few seconds, absently chewing on his lower lip. Then he rolls back over until they’re next to each other again. “Thanks for showing me the telescope,” he says. “It’s really cool.”

“Sure,” Hajime says. There’s a silence between them. Normally, their silences are very comfortable, but this one feels different, like it’s charged with nervous energy. Hajime doesn’t know what to do about it. From the look on Tooru’s face, he doesn’t know either.

“Umm,” Hajime says finally. “Did you finish the math homework?”

“Are you kidding?” Tooru says, laughing, and the moment is over.

-

“I have a fantastic idea,” Tooru announces as he haphazardly tosses his backpack onto the floor of Hajime’s bedroom.

“Really?” Hajime asks wryly. “That seems unlikely.”

“For someone who claims to be my best friend, you sure are mean to me,” Tooru says, affecting a pout. The pouty face is something that Tooru has recently adopted, and if the universe doesn’t completely despise Hajime, Tooru will never find out exactly how effective it is, even when Hajime knows he’s just kidding around.

“Whatever,” Hajime says, shoving Tooru’s shoulder on his way to sit down at his desk. “What’s your fantastic idea?”

Tooru springs up onto Hajime’s bed and turns to face him. “I’m not sure if you noticed, but today happens to be Friday the 13th.”

Hajime just looks at him. Tooru deflates a little under his uncomprehending gaze.

“You know,” he tries again, “Friday the 13th? A day when scary stuff is supposed to happen?”

“I’ve never heard of that,” Hajime says.

Tooru sighs. “Well, anyway, it’s like a cursed day. Supposedly. According to legend.”

“What legend?”

“Ugh!” Tooru groans in frustration. “I don’t know what legend! That’s just how it is! It’s like—hey, why are you laughing?! Were you messing with me?!”

Hajime is sitting backwards in his desk chair, his face pillowed in his arms against the chair back, laughing like he just heard the funniest joke of his life.

“You’re so—” Tooru starts, but he can’t be mad at Hajime when he’s grinning at him like that.

“Sorry, I’m sorry,” Hajime says eventually, still smiling hugely. He slides out of his desk chair and onto the floor, rests his elbows on the ground and cradles his face in his hands, looking up at Tooru. “Yes, I am familiar with the lore surrounding Friday the 13th.”

“You’re such an asshole,” Tooru mutters. He wants to leap down from the bed and tackle Hajime into the floor, but his brain quickly vetoes that idea before his body can begin any motion. “Anyway, my fantastic idea, on this 13th day of the month which happens to be a Friday, is that we have a horror movie marathon.”

Hajime raises his eyebrows. “Really? You wouldn’t even go through our haunted room at school last year, and you were one of the people who set it up.”

“That’s because I knew it was gonna be really scary! I was there for rehearsal! Hajime, it looked so completely different with the lights off, I swear.”

“I know. I went through it.” Hajime pauses. “It was alright.”

“Just alright, huh—”

“So,” Hajime interrupts smoothly, “a horror movie marathon, huh? Well, what movies did you have in mind?”

An hour later, Hajime and Tooru are sitting on the living room couch, a big bowl of popcorn between them and four movies queued up. Tooru has a blanket wrapped around himself, but Hajime has forbidden him from using it to cover his eyes. As they’re about to start the first movie, Hajime’s mom walks in the room, smiling at them.

“Hey, boys,” she says cheerfully. “What are you up to?”

“Tooru wanted to have a horror movie marathon even though he’s a sissy baby, so I’m humoring him,” Hajime deadpans.

“Hey!” Tooru immediately objects. “I am not a sissy baby!”

“Sure you aren’t.”

“I’m not!”

“Okay, well,” Hajime’s mom interjects firmly, fixing her gaze on Hajime, “your dad and I are going out to dinner, so don’t cause any trouble, okay?”

“We’ll be right here,” Hajime replies obediently. “Unless, of course, Tooru runs away in fright and I have to go find him—”

“Why are you like this?!”

Hajime is laughing. Tooru doesn’t actually seem offended, so Hajime’s mother collects her husband and the two of them leave the house.

Hajime gets up to turn all the lights off, then settles into his spot on the couch. “You ready for this?” he asks Tooru, smirking.

Tooru can barely see Hajime’s face, but he can hear the challenge in his voice. “I was born ready.”

As it turns out, Tooru was not born ready. They’re hardly 20 minutes into the first movie and Tooru is already starting to get a little freaked out. Someone is stalking this woman who thinks she’s home alone, and of course it’s nighttime, and she has no idea there’s anyone following her, until she goes into the bathroom to wash her face. As she lifts her face up from the sink, she catches her reflection in the mirror—only, there’s another reflection in it too.

“Holyshit!” Tooru squeaks, bunching the words together. He reaches over to grab some popcorn as a cover-up, but there’s no way Hajime didn’t hear that. In fact, Tooru is confused as to why Hajime isn’t currently making fun of him—“Ah-ha!” Tooru shouts triumphantly, leaning in to get a better look at Hajime’s face. “You’re crying! Those are fear tears!”

“Shut up!” Hajime says, rubbing frantically at his eyes. “It just happens! It doesn’t mean I’m actually scared or anything _ohmygod_ —” The woman onscreen shrieks in terror, and suddenly Hajime’s hand is clenched onto Tooru’s shoulder.

Tooru stares from the movie to Hajime’s face to his friend’s white-knuckled hand, which is slowly cutting off the blood supply to his arm. He fumbles for the remote with his opposite hand and pauses the movie. “Okay,” Tooru says, breathing quicker than usual, “I’m scared. You’re scared. Do you wanna finish this movie?”

“Yes,” Hajime replies through clenched teeth, his hand never leaving Tooru’s shoulder.

Even in his state of fear, Tooru can’t help it. “Who’s the sissy baby now, huh?”

Hajime shoots him a weak glare. “Whatever. Just—” He pauses, and if Tooru isn’t mistaken, Hajime’s face looks a little red. “Whatever. Come here.”

Tooru stares at him in confusion. Hajime releases his death-grip on Tooru’s shoulder and uses that hand to move the popcorn bowl to the floor, then shifts his eyes from Tooru’s face to the newly opened spot on the couch.

“Oh,” Tooru says simply. He scoots over, and their shoulders press together. This definitely feels safer. Hajime seems to think so too, because his face relaxes into an almost calm expression. Tooru tucks his knees up and readjusts the blanket so that it’s draped over both of them.

“Ready?” Tooru asks, reaching for the remote.

Hajime’s lips curl into a smirk. “I was born rea—”

Tooru covers Hajime’s mouth with the blanket.

-

Hajime’s parents return home a little after 11. The TV is still on, but it’s displaying a DVD menu screen and replaying the same creepy tune every 15 seconds or so. Hajime’s parents turn from the TV to the couch, and Hajime’s mother claps a hand over her mouth in delight at what she sees. The two boys are asleep, Tooru’s head resting on Hajime’s shoulder and Hajime’s arm wound loosely around Tooru’s back.

Hajime’s father is smiling, too. “Should we wake them up?” he whispers.

“In a minute.” Hajime’s mom snaps a picture with her phone, and her husband chuckles quietly.

“Too bad the lighting is so poor,” he says.

“It actually turned out pretty well,” his wife replies. She tucks her phone back in her jacket pocket and watches her son, who looks so relaxed and calm. “I’m so glad he moved here,” she whispers after a minute, shifting her gaze to Tooru, who appears to be smiling in his sleep.

“Me too,” Hajime’s dad whispers back.

They turn off the TV and decide to let the boys sleep.

-

When Hajime wakes up, his right arm is completely numb. This is the first thing he notices. The second thing he notices is that he appears to have a large tuft of hair in his mouth, which he promptly spits out. The person attached to that particular tuft of hair lets out a yawn and lifts his head. Tooru’s eyes meet Hajime’s from a distance of approximately six inches apart. For a few moments, they just blink at each other, and then Tooru breaks.

“Good morning, sunshine!” he calls in a warbling voice that is much higher than his usual pitch, at the same time as Hajime says gruffly, “I can’t feel my arm.”

“Oh!” Tooru says. Hajime’s arm is draped across his chest, and when he tries to lift it for him, Hajime tumbles backwards off the couch. Tooru is pretty sure he’s not strong enough to have caused that fall, but still—

“Are you okay?” he asks, peeking over the edge of the couch. Hajime’s hair is an absolute disaster. He hopes his own hair doesn’t currently look like that.

“I’m fine,” comes the muffled reply from the floor. Hajime is lying face down, but Tooru can clearly see that the tips of his ears are red. Tooru wasn’t feeling particularly embarrassed a minute ago, but seeing that appears to have changed his mind.

“Dibs on the bathroom!” he calls, and hurriedly leaps off the couch.

From the floor, Hajime lets out a loud groan.

-

Hidenori is asleep in Masako’s lap when Tooru gets home, so he pads quietly to his bedroom and shuts the door. He sits down heavily on his bed and releases a long, dramatic sigh.

Tooru was beginning to figure something out, and it was terrifying.

Hajime was his best friend. In fact, Hajime was his only real friend. Tooru had never invited anyone else from school to come over to his apartment, and it wasn’t because he disliked all his classmates. He sat next to a girl in his earth science class who was really nice, and they often chatted before class started. He also had a different lunch period than Hajime, so he sat at a table with a few boys from the school’s soccer team, one of which was in his drawing class. He enjoyed the company of these other people, but he certainly would never sacrifice time with Hajime in order to hang out with them. It wasn’t that they were boring, or unkind, or difficult to get along with, it was just…well. Being with Hajime was so different than being with them.

Maybe it was simply because they had been friends for so long, Tooru thinks, rolling over on his bed, but even as that thought came to him, he knew it wasn’t entirely true. He can’t help thinking back to last week, when a girl from one of his classes—he can’t remember which class—had stopped him at his locker, pressed a note into his hand, and fled. Bewildered, he had opened the envelope, and as soon as he read the first sentence, he knew exactly what the note was about, and an uneasy feeling settled in his stomach.

Even though the event had only been a week ago, Tooru can’t remember the girl’s name, or exactly what he told her when he had turned her down. It was like his brain was desperately trying to erase the entire incident from his memory, except for one part that remains crystal clear: he was thinking about Hajime the whole time.

“Urgh,” he groans, burying his face into his pillow. He feels a little guilty for not telling Hajime about the girl, but what could he say?

“Hey, buddy,” he says out loud, his tone drenched in sarcasm, the words muffled horribly by the pillow covering his mouth, “this really nice girl asked me out and I turned her down because I—because what? Because even though we spend so much time together, I never stop thinking about you? Because you’re the most important person in my life and nothing will ever change that? Because when I read her letter, I wanted to pretend that it was from you? I—ugh!” This is all ridiculous, Tooru decides. Everything else aside, Hajime is his best friend, and Tooru would never do anything to jeopardize their relationship as it stands. If he were to have a falling-out with Hajime—he doesn’t even want to think about how terrible that would be.

He’s plenty tired when he goes to bed that night, but it takes a very long time for him to fall asleep.

-

Hajime always wakes up early, but today, he’s out of bed before the sun has risen. He had slept fitfully and awoke feeling strung-out with nervous energy, so he’s making a circuit around the cow pasture on foot, trying to burn away the restlessness in his bones.

Something happened between him and Tooru yesterday, he thinks later, as he herds the cows into their stalls. Immediately, his brain latches onto the worst possible scenario: Tooru has figured out that Hajime is harboring more-than-friendly feelings towards him, and he’s creeped out by it.

Hajime has long since come to terms with his feelings for Tooru, and he’s honestly surprised that Tooru doesn’t have more admirers, although very glad that that doesn’t appear to be the case. He thinks he’s doing a pretty good job of burying his—he nearly shudders at the word— _romantic_ feelings for Tooru under his normal best-friend layer of concern and closeness, but what if Tooru really is starting to figure it out? It’s a secret that has the strong potential to be friendship-ruining, and Hajime is determined to never let that happen.

So, he thinks, as he dumps a bag of cow feed into a wheelbarrow, he’ll just have to be better about keeping that secret hidden. And if he feels a physical ache in his chest every time he wants to reach out to Tooru but can’t, well, that’s a small price to pay for the maintenance of their friendship.

-

One morning the following week, Hajime comes back in from feeding the horses to find a small gift-wrapped package on his bed. The wrapping paper is plain, and there’s no label anywhere on it. Curious, Hajime tears open the paper to find a box containing a cell phone, and his face lights up. He had felt a little bit behind the other students, who all seemed to have cell phones as soon as middle school began, and he’s happy to have finally caught up. As he lifts the lid off the box, a piece of paper falls out, and Hajime immediately recognizes his mom’s slanted handwriting:

 

_Your dad and I figured it was about time.  
PS: Tooru should also be receiving one today. :)_

Hajime eagerly gets to work setting up the phone, smiling to himself the whole time.

-

_Can I come over after school today???_

_Why are you texting me when we’re gonna see each other in like 10 min._

_Coz it’s fun :) ;) :)_

_…Did you think I wouldn’t notice that winky face you threw in there_

_What winky face?? :) ;) :)_

_Dammit Tooru_

_What?_  
_Hajime??_  
_You never answered my question!!!_

-

Things between them return to relative normalcy after that. Hajime is careful not to let any touches or glances linger too long, and Tooru doesn’t seem to notice a change in his behavior, or if he does, he keeps it to himself. Tooru still goes to the farm nearly every other day, and when Tooru isn’t at Hajime’s house, Hajime is at Tooru’s apartment, working on homework or visiting with Masako and Hidenori. It’s during one of these homework visits that Tooru decides to drop a bomb on him.

Tooru is at his desk, staring at his textbook with a glazed look in his eyes, and Hajime is seated on the floor, pretending to be working on math homework, but spending more time studying Tooru’s profile than doing anything school-related. Tooru’s gaze flicks upwards from his book and he catches Hajime’s eyes. Before Hajime can even turn away, Tooru is drawing in a breath and then beginning to speak.

“So, two weeks ago…” he starts, and then falters. He looks fidgety, Hajime thinks, and a curl of unease begins to unfold in Hajime’s stomach.

Tooru stares determinedly into Hajime’s eyes and then continues. “A girl from one of my classes, umm…well, she asked me out.”

Hajime’s stomach drops. Of course. Why hadn’t he thought of this? He was so concerned with hiding his own feelings, he had never even considered—

“I turned her down,” Tooru adds quickly, and Hajime breathes an audible sigh of relief, which he tries to cover up with a cough. “She was really nice, but…I just think…” Tooru’s face is steadily turning pink, and Hajime feels like he might explode. “I really like going to the farm with you, and riding the horses, and stargazing at night, and if I had…well, a girlfriend, I probably wouldn’t have time to do all that stuff. So. Umm. I just figured I would tell you.”

Hajime stares at him. Tooru is biting his lip, his gaze shifting from the floor to Hajime’s face and back again, and Hajime can’t take it anymore.

“Stand up,” he says, and surprises himself with how commanding his tone sounds. Tooru obeys immediately, hands twitching by his sides. Hajime lifts himself off the floor and closes the short distance between them. Before he can stop and overthink it, he pulls Tooru into a tight hug, and to his secret delight, Tooru’s arms immediately wrap around him.

“I hope you turned her down nicely,” Hajime says softly.

“I assure you, I was a perfect gentleman,” Tooru replies.

They stay like that for a minute. It’s not quite a confession, but it’s enough for now.

**Author's Note:**

> Part 2 coming after I catch up on some sleep
> 
> Say hi to me on [tumblr](http://www.deadpan-snarker.tumblr.com) if you please!


End file.
